Don’t know what’s come over me this week, I can’t motivate myself to do anything. Managed 150m of the swim test and stopped. Turbo lasted about 15 minutes before I got angry with it and trying to run on a treadmill last night was pitiful, I had some slight discomfort in my hips and had a bit of a paddy.
I don’t know why I’m feeling like this, normally, no matter whether I want to do it or not I just get on with it and after a few minutes I realise how much I love it and I’m just not getting that this week. It is even more odd since I had such a good swim session on Monday. The other thing that suffers with a lack of motivation is diet, I’ve definitely been eating badly and drinking too much this week. This ends up being a vicious circle as then the weight goes up which just makes me think “what’s the point”
I know it’s a self perpetuating cycle, but I can’t seem to pull myself out of it this week. I am really trying to rationalise it, but I don’t know what the cause is! It could be the weather, it could be that I’ve not lost as much weight as I thought I should. It could be that I’ve been drinking too much and not eating right. I started eating wheat again, to see whether or not it hurt, and it didn’t seem to so it’s crept back into my diet a bit and I think this could be a factor as I find I’m much hungrier after eating them.
Not keeping up my food diary has meant that I am not confronted with my choices, and that has definitely had an effect, I just put the week into the diary and look what came out:
That is definitely not a good week.
So that spells it out really. I will make sure I keep my food diary up to date from now on, it’s a very good tool for me. I will also keep it up over the weekend.
I know that I need to be careful with the alcohol, and I am trying to make good steps into doing it, but I also know that it’s Christmas coming up and the whole of December turns into a month long binge. I know that if I really wanted to I could avoid the drink, but I also know that I live with 4 other people who like a drink and I am easily led. I think drinking is so deeply embedded in my psyche that it’s really hard to not drink. I remember always being told that people who didn’t drink were boring and that was from a very early age, everyone around me has always been a drinker, and this transition from alcohol to athletics is more difficult than I thought it would be, that’s not to say it’s not going to happen, I just need to accept that it’s not going to happen overnight. I gave up smoking with Allen Carr’s easyway book and that changed how I saw smoking, it changed my perception of what it was to be a smoker and I think I need to do something similar with drinking.
This was definitely a worthwhile bit of writing as I’ve reminded myself where my problem areas are and that they need to be dealt with.
Have a nice weekend!